I’m the daughter of a microbiologist – which is why this crusade against unseen germs doesn’t impress me. …I hold to the notion that, broadly speaking, wood is naturally antibacterial. I’ve had the same chopping board for more than 15 years, and I’ve only ever wiped it with a damp, soapy cloth; no one has died so far. The creepy trend for boiling spoons – it is said to result in gruesome excretions – began on TikTok. …I read about this, and even as I rolled my eyes – how utterly deranged, I thought. …Our attitude to hygiene, and by extension to dirt in all its multifarious forms, is increasingly strange and stupid. I’ve never known our city streets to look more filthy. But while this seems to induce no disgust whatsoever in most people… much of the rest of life induces rank nausea.